In Case You Didn’t Know: Rape is Wrong

Rape is wrong.

If you don’t agree with that please go to the top of this page and click the exit button. Thanks.

If you are still here, I am infuriated/disappointed with the defenders of Nate Parker right now. For anyone who is not up to date, I am going to give you a short summary.

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Nate Parker, an African American actor who has starred in many movies and is an “advocate” for black people, raped a woman. He and his friend, who co-writes with him, raped a woman. They raped her while they were college students and then harassed her for reporting them. Nate Parker was found innocent because he had consensual sex with her prior to the assault. His friend was found guilty and then the case was dropped because the victim did not want to testify again. The victim was traumatized for the years following and eventually committed suicide a few years ago.  

Okay now that we are up to speed, here is my rant.

For everyone supporting and defending Nate Parker, you are truly misguided. He raped a woman and then harassed her. There are reports and witnesses that saw him harass her. She could not finish her degree due to the harassment. Penn State gave this woman a settlement after she sued them because they handled the situation horribly. She attempted to commit suicide two times before she succeeded.

She is deceased.

Nate Parker and his friend, Jean Celestin, destroyed this woman.

They destroyed her. So forgive me if I am seething with anger because people are defending this man. Rape is a common crime, yet it is so hard for people to believe a woman when she says she has been violated. I have never experienced rape, but I can only sympathize with the idea that one’s own body is the site of their pain. That when you touch yourself, your body is somehow a crime scene and a sight of supposed eventual healing.

But the rapist is somehow the victim. They are the victim of time and place. Of misguidance. Of one too many drinks. They didn’t mean it. It was a painful time in their lives. We have to let them grow from their mistakes.

This brings me back to Nate Parker. Now, a few days ago he was interviewed about this rape case. He said things like “It was a painful time.” “I now have a wife and five children.” He acted like a guilty man. Because he is. Then he had the nerve to write a post about his innocence while acknowledging this woman’s death….

I read the court documents and a transcript, because I wanted to do research. They were deplorable. I mean I don’t understand how they weren’t found guilty. But then again this is the American justice system we are talking about. Here are some links:

https://pmcdeadline2.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/callexcerpt-wm.pdf

https://pmcdeadline2.files.wordpress.com/2016/08/civil-complaint-2-wm.pdf

When I read that Mr. Parker was proven innocent because he had consensual sex with the victim before, my jaw dropped. Having consensual sex once does not mean it will always be consensual. Please read that sentence one more time. This is how rape can occur in relationships such as marriage. No one in this entire world has FULL control over your body but you. So yeah Nate Parker raped this woman and then in a phone conversation tried to convince her she gave consent. He got off. His friend eventually got off too. Literally and figuratively. And they were both allowed to flourish and live their lives.

Let me remind you. She is not living.

I don’t care that he has been in lots of movies. I don’t care that he is talented. I don’t care that he wrote a movie about a slave revolt. He is a rapist. And for the black people who are saying he is a black man and we should still support him because he doing great things for us…nah. I am a black woman. Those two are inherently intertwined. My womanhood is my blackness and my blackness is my womanhood. Nate Parker isn’t doing anything for me, because he doesn’t respect womanhood and therefore he doesn’t respect my blackness.

I am not going to watch his movie.

Because every time I see him on a screen I will think of the woman who lost her life due to his violent act. The victim who wasn’t sure if she was pregnant. The victim who kept asking her assaulter questions that he couldn’t answer. I will think of the women I personally know who were violated. And I will cry and be angry because his narrative and many rapists’ narratives are still prominent. People are arguing about him and what this will do to his career, but rarely talk about the victim. Some news sources are calling her his accuser. I cannot with this world. We defend murder and rape. We protect the famous and discard the future.

Nate Parker is a rapist.

He has a family, writes, acts, preaches about blackness and….. is a rapist.

He is not the first nor will he be the last.

And this conversation will just continue to tell survivors that they live in a world that doesn’t support them. Some will choose death like his victim and some will fight on forever scarred.

Rape is wrong.

That is a fact.

Why is there always a “But…”

 

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